Originally published in Planet Magazine No. 33 (March 2002).
Planet humbly presents a brilliant new sub-branch of Haiku that we have created — “TolKu”, which is haiku inspired by the works of J.R.R. Tolkien. Note: All Tolkien characters are the property of their copyright and trademark holders. Any bad jokes here are the property of Planet Magazine.
INTREPID HOBBIT
(The Council of Elrond Convenes)
Behold brave Frodo
Ring-bearer, bound for Mordor
Better you than me
SAM’S DARKEST HOUR
Oh, Mr. Frodo!
Sir, watch out for that Gollum!
Cripes, this ain’t worth it…
BASTARD SAURON
That bastard Sauron
Lording it over us all!
Him and his damn “Eye”
SARUMAN’S LAMENT
Consider the Orc
Brutal, fetid, and hairy
Just like my ex-wife
TolKu and artwork copyright 2002 by Andrew G. McCann
