Planet Magazine No. 17

Originally published as Planet Magazine No. 17 (March 1998) on the classic Planet Magazine site.

Planet Magazine

Planet Magazine March 1998 (Vol. 5, No. 1)
Wild Science Fiction, Fantasy, Horror, Humor & Poetry — Online!
FREE!

Computer render of spidery, long-legged probe machines with dark domed bodies walking over a rocky tan landscape under a blue sky
Cover art: “Gully Probe” by Theo

Table of Contents

Inside this Peachy-Yet-Unimpeachable Zine:

Editorial & Letters · About the Authors · About this Magazine

Science Fiction

Fantasy

Horror

  • Freak by Steven R. Zellers

Poetry

Humor

Cover Art by: Theo

Planet Magazine as a whole is copyright ©1998 by Andrew G. McCann. Individual stories, poems, and illustrations are copyright their respective authors or creators. Planet Magazine is an award-winning free electronic quarterly of short science fiction, fantasy, horror, poetry, and humor written by new or little-known writers. Online and in color worldwide since January 1994. Like you care.

Editorial & Letters

Editorial & Letters

“Planet Magazine: Suckering, er succoring, readers since 1994!”

ROUTE 666

Hi. I’m wearing a casual sweater and corduroy pants while standing by the side of the Information Superhighway, soon to become just another lost highway if I’ve got the say-so — and you’d better believe I’ve got the say-so. My left hand is in my pocket, which is body language for “I’ve got a secret,” and I’m sporting a new, almost-handsome haircut, mitigated by the cryptic half-smile of a dangerous nerd. Now my hand comes out of my pocket, flapping in simulated speech, because it/I want(s) to let you in on something big: My visions of the future. Here goes.

Scenario 1: Sometime in the near future, a space plane lands at a port on a Caribbean Island. Some gala-colored tourists disembark. Meanwhile, one of the local peasants sits alone on a nearby beach, bored and rather angry – that’s because it’s now illegal to work. However, he’s got a banana-government-issued Microsoft-brand FingerPC e-wallet that’s running WinCE 5.whatever; he flops it open, and the balance reads exactly $0.00. Meanwhile, I’m back in Seattle telecommuting from a car’s dashboard that’s been installed in the Master Library (paper books supplied by Books-By-The-Yard Inc.) of my home, which is fully armored.

Scenario 2: Sometime in the near future, a planet is terraformed with the look of Disney’s Fantasia (appropriate trademarks fees paid, etc.). There are knights, castles, bioengineered dragons, and so forth; however, after a few generations the resident “employees” begin to forget that they were put there originally to amuse parti-frocked tourists. They begin killing the vacationers, and in the most gruesomely imaginative ways. At the same time, I’m at home in my Seattle fortress, breathing recirculated atmosphere that’s saturated with life-prolonging drugs; in the background, the flat-panel-display walls murmur (business news stories, each a $0.05 micropayment).

Scenario 3: Sometime in the near future, the world is a global, wildlife-free parkland punctuated by super-dense, ultra-tall cities (picture the Emerald City in “The Wizard of Oz,” as seen from the field of poppies, but not so obviously a painting). These cities are self-contained, self-absorbed, insular, tribal, and, as a result, frequently at war with one another; over time, these wars increase in their creative use of violence. For example, the Los Nevada arcology breeds people-ripping ants the size of bears and looses them inside Denver’s weather-control ducts. Denver, though, has tapped its rival’s power grid and is inflicting a series of crippling blackouts (picture an elevator free-falling 300 stories). By the way, everything, including the bear-ants, is powered by the latest version of Windows CE. Concurrently, I brood alone in the art deco dungeon laboratory of my Seattle Keep — the only home in the world running WindowsNT version 8.something-or-other.

But I’ve said too much already. The point is, I expect the future to be a great time. And if you’re currently “unwired,” don’t worry. Sometime in the near future my associates will bring the Internet directly to you and to everyone else in the world — by force, if necessary.

Here’s to the Road Ahead,
Andrew G. McCann, Editor
Planet Magazine
March 1998

ACTUAL LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Dear PlanetZine: Hi, I’m Allan Cole, the SF/Fantasy author. I just happened on your site and was most impressed. And I thought it was only right to take a moment and say so. When I update my homepage early next year, I’ll be sure to include your URL. Keep up the great work! Places like yours are sorely needed in this too-ordinary world.
Happy Holidays,
Allan Cole
<http://www.acole.com>

To The Editor: I’d like to present to you my trilogy adventure series, Tales of King Dunen. Originally written for young people, it has been widely accepted by adult readers. Ever since reading my first fiction, The Hobbit, when I was about 10 years old, I became a lover of fantasy and science fiction. Ever a dreamer, I began to write the stories that rolled in my mind. This series is not the last of my writing. I am working on a prequel to Tales of King Dunen and hopefully a fourth book in the series. The series is fast-paced, thought-provoking, and emotional. I invite you and your readers to join me in my worlds.
Arthur Miriello
<http://members.tripod.com/~OIS>

The Editors: Your readers are cordially invited to drop in to <http://members.aol.com/KWOrca/> for a look at this mainstream novelist’s first venture into the realm of science fiction. My novel THE ROSWELL INHERITANCE was inspired by a chance meeting with an elderly Roswell resident and fellow pilot who had an entirely different take on what may have transpired there back in 1947. As a former science writer, pilot and film documentarian, I think I can say with some confidence that you’ll find the piece relatively well-researched and the theory positively fascinating.
Keep up the good work. Planet is a great and entertaining resource.
F.M. (Michael) O’Rourke

Dear Editor: I found Planet Magazine quite by accident, but it is a very good site. I have read three stories so far and they were all very good. In fact the whole thing was damn good, and quite beyond a lot of the poor show out there.
All de best. Good stuff.
Dave Brown, Technician
via e-mail

Dear Editor: I am interested in having you review my site and/or book: <http://www.theschwacorporation.com>. Incredible, deceptively simple post-modern sci-fi art mystery site explores new dimensions in website design. For Your Edification and Amusement, the Schwa Corporation is Pleased to Present The MOST THRILLING ALL NEW SITE of its kind… From incredible Wonders to singular Constructions of pixel and bit, The Schwa Corporation’s Advanced Training Center promises to keep its guests amazed with hours of Amusement… See the 4,250-foot tall Scale Model Of The Solar System by CDI Industries, where one pixel equals a thousand miles! Enter the Name The Solar System Contest, scroll the18.6-Mile-Wide Light Ruler, view the mysterious Radia, lounge in the The Schwa Corporate Theatre and eventually you will come to THE WORLD’s LARGEST WEBPAGES!!! Take a breath before you attempt to navigate their 47,961 SQUARE MILES of Vast Space! Install a new hard-drive to satisfy the hunger of web pages 219 miles on a side! After you’ve done all that, see if you can run the Schwa Control Room and gain access to the Schwa Classified Area… It’s all there and it’s free at http://www.theschwacorporation.com. Don’t miss it. Please reply if you would also like a copy of my new book the “Schwa World Operations Manual” to review. Published by Chronicle Books.
[No Signature]

[Editor’s Note: We respectully informed the entities at Schwa that we don’t do reviews or carry ads, but we did agree to run their letter in this issue as a favor. Moreover, we mentioned to them that, personally, we ourselves, and speaking just for us, believe that aliens are real, are our mortal enemies, yet should be fully cooperated with now to ensure a good job post-invasion. Schwa was kind enough to respond and imply that we are already doing a good job. Thumbs up!]

LETTERS TO GODLESS MONSTERS

Dear Undead: What’s the big deal about the Leader of Our Nation fondling a couple/few interns? Hey, me and my football buddies groped President Clinton Himself back in high school during a field trip to D.C. And you don’t see him run blubbering to Ken Starr-Chamber about it.
Much Later,
Owen “Ann” Eksplanacion

Dear Cthulu: I hate it when someone comes up to me on the street, in restaurants, or what-have-you, and says something like, “Excuse me, but WHAT are you?” or “My wife and I were just wondering WHERE you are from?!” And then when, or IF, I tell them, they’ll say something like: “Hey, then say something in Swedish, or maybe English, or Spanish, or whatever!” It’s so depressing. Why can’t they see me as just another U.S. citizen? I can’t help it if I’m different. Boy, things really have changed on Earth since that multi-planetary alien invasion force landed last week and killed every human but me (just lucky, I guess! The Liqua Virus doesn’t seem to have any effect on me at all!). To comfort myself, I just remember back to how my three-foot-tall, horned, bright-red friend Schglorftt from the planet Brzinkfreeooooowappp — at that time, the only alien on Earth — must have felt. High school really was hell for him, and not just because he looked like Satan! ‘Course, now I sheepishly realize he was the not-too-deep-cover vanguard of the invasion force. Duh!
Please, Please Supersize Me,
“Mac” Donald M. Ployee

Dear Anne Rice: I am searching for funding for my scientific (or, as I call them, “scien-terrific”) experiments. Rest assured that I have changed my ways and am quite legitimate now. To this very day I regret that time I created a superhuman army — actually a race of giant bio-robots — that, unfortunately, required a diet of ranch-style homes in order to survive. Boy, did I have a lot of explaining to do down at the local precinct. Well, I’ll be off now in my home-built flying saucer, which is powered by a perpetual-motion engine.
Sincerely,
Prof. “Moocho” DeNiro
(brother of Robt.)

Dear Ken Starr: Greetings, Cyber-Friends! I am a computer-generated “netbot,” sent out to determine your likes and dislikes! I am also capable of writing letters to zines, as you can see! Remember, let us know everything about you, so that we can generate one-to-one “push” marketing to meet all of your consumer needs!
Regards,
Dunne & Dunne,
Cyburp Inc.

Dear Socks and Buddy: Well, well. You “people” at Planet Magazine seem to be pretty damn sure of yourselves. A little “proud” — maybe too proud, if you ask me. Well let me just tell you a little something about pride. Pride is getting to work every day at 5 a.m., even though the workday starts at 8:30 a.m. Pride is covering for your lazy co-workers. Pride is turning down your paycheck and watching your family go hungry. Pride is giving your car away to a random teenager — even if the little punk already has a car! Pride is throwing your rent money in the garbage can. Pride is drinking a quart of vodka in one sitting and NOT SHOWING THAT YOU’RE DRUNK! Pride is disappearing in the middle of the night to embark on a cross-country adventure of killing a series of strangers! Now that’s Pride, dammit. Or am I confusing “pride” with something else?
Lemme Know, ‘kay?
Bing Cherry

Dear Liam Gallagher: Thank you for publishing that e-mail alert on spam in your last issue. Well, have we got something for you — spam that knows it’s spam and is damn proud of it
“PLEASE FORWARD THIS TO HELP THIS LITTLE SPAMMER
Dear All, I just received this spam from a friend of mine in my office. Please respond to it. It will just mean employing a little bit of time and won’t cost you a penny. All it needs is the heart for you to send this mail. PLEASE pass this spam on to everybody you know. It is the request of a little girl who has been a victim of the terrible problem called REVOKED COMPUTER PRIVILEGES AT THE HIGH SCHOOL LAB. Thank you for your effort, because this isn’t just a chain letter, but a choice for all of us to help a little girl that’s dying to create a memorable spam (but Asst. Principal Jenkins won’t let her hack the school’s PCs anymore!). So please send this to everyone you know…or don’t know. This little girl has six months left to go under her banishment from the Computer Lab, which is forever when you’re a teen, so she wanted to send a chain letter telling everyone to live their life to the fullest, since she never will, or not for a few months, at least. She’ll never make it to the prom this year (she’s a sophmore), graduate from high school (ditto), or get married and have a family of her own (until she turns 18, and Stu has to ask her first, anyway). By you sending this spam to as many people as possible, you can give her a little hope, because with every name that this is sent to, The American Spam Institute will donate 3 cents per name to buying this little girl a refurbished Presario and an unlimited AOL account (for 50 hours, at any rate). One guy sent this spam to 500 people!!!! So, I know that you could send it to at least five or six. Come on, you guys…and if you’re too selfish to take 10-15 lousy minutes scrolling this and forwarding it to EVERYONE, then you are just one sick, uncaring person. Just think, it could be YOU one day without a computer. Hey, it’s not even your _money_, it’s just your time!!!
PLEASE PASS IT ON,
Tim Panee
Stu De Lamb

Dear Spice Girls and Boys: If I could be any character in Lord of the Rings? Hmm. I think I’d like to be that skeleton in the Paths of the Dead whose sword is wedged in a stone doorway. That guy is kewl.
Rolefully,
Madge Icke

Dear M&M Candies Characters: Chemistry is indeed important in a relationship. But no more so than biology, math, the social sciences, or any other part of a high-quality educational curriculum. Oh, the light that I could have brought to the world — if I only I hadn’t suffered that career-ending lack of talent.
With One Eyebrow Arched,
A. Professor

Dear Art Modell: In my opinion, any adult who drives around with a cup of hot coffee between their legs deserves to get burned. And any burnee who brings a lawsuit in such a case deserves not millions of dollars but a judicial reprimand for not buying a cheap, plastic cupholder or simply waiting to drink the coffee later. Meanwhile, why hasn’t McDonald’s been sued for creating the ArchDeluxe, which is neither “arch” nor “deluxe,” in my humble opinion as a fictional character. But an over-“arching” issue, as I see it, is how do we prevent people from injuring themselves when they spill hot auto parts inside McDonald’s Restaurants? And perhaps even more important, why haven’t I won the Lotto? Am I being punished by New York State and by McDonald’s just because I refuse to buy a lottery
ticket or an ArchDeluxe? And why are Big Macs so much better than Big PCs?
Regards,
Jess “Josh” Ing

Dear Intel “Bunny People” Disco Clean-Room Workers: I couldn’t help but notice that the previous writer mentioned the Mac/PC debate, of which not enough has been written. Please note that not one of my Mac servers, end-user systems, end-users, bio-robots, or terraformed computer-controlled worlds has EVER crashed (not even a hiccup), and all of them have been running MacOS round-the-clock since at least the mid-14th Century, by the reckoning of your planet’s Western societies. (I know, I know, how could I have had an operating system that long when it’s only existed for a decade or so — please, let’s not get into that tired time-travel-is-impossible debate right now.) However, I will also note that I had a couple of those Class M stars running Windows NT, but they locked up and went supernova just last week. Generally, I find plain old UNIX the best operating system for stars ranging from red giants, to neutrons, to even Kevin Costner. Speaking of which, don’t ask me about black holes — they run only CP/M, which is not my field of expertise.
That’s That!
Sir Ver Soffwehr

Dear Editor: I’d like to make an announcement to those glorious convict-volunteers scheduled to board the cryogenic “Sardine II” space ark, whose mission is to cruise the universe at half-light speed for an Earth-like planet, and then manually terraform it: If any of you need to go to the bathroom, leak now, or forever hold your pee. Ha-ha! No, seriously, we’ve got catheters ‘n’ junk like that in every sleep coffin, I mean, container.
No Worries, ‘Mates
Yuri Narybloch *

About the Authors

About the Authors

“Planet Magazine Says: “A Watched Boil Never Pops”

Charles Albano (“Let It Sleep”, “Live From Planet Three”, “The Unbounded“) is an adjunct professor of management at Fairleigh Dickinson University in New Jersey. He also operates his own firm (Adaptive Leadership) providing management training to business and government (his business site is being built now). He takes particular interest in new paradigms in the sciences that will influence human affairs. He has only recently been submitting his collected poems for publication. His poems have been accepted in Grepoetry, The Central California Poetry Review, Creative Studios, Centerfold-Online, The Poetic Express, and Garden of Grasses. Charles’ business site on the Web is now established at: <http://adaptive-leadership.com>, which features his collection of over 30 business and leadership poems.

Allen Butler (“The Mud Puddle“) is a student who likes to write in his spare time.

Atk. Butterfly (“Spacer’s Digest“) works as a Computer Programmer/Systems Analyst, most often as a contractor. An avid science fiction reader, Atk. has written a number of science fiction stories. Some have actually been published, in Aphelion, The Blue Lady, Dragon Dreaming, The Dragon’s Lair, Dream Forge, Eternity Online, Exodus, Fusion, Just Because, Keen Science Fiction!, Professional Writers Forum, The Rock, The Tales’ Realm, TimeWinder, Titan Webzine, and Veils Magazine. As well, he wrote a few technical computer articles which were published in computer magazines. His novel, Washout, is available online from HyperBooks Online at <http://www.hyperbooks.com/>. Atk. is an Event Host on Prodigy in the Books and Writing Area, where he moderates a writing workshop for science fiction, fantasy, horror, and humor. He is presently the editor of Preditors & Editors, a Web resource for writers, composers, and artists, located at <http://pages.prodigy.com/sf4free>, which he hopes people will visit and enjoy.

David Corbett (“The Feeling Begins“) has an overflowing imagination, and is trying to see if he
has enough willpower to put it all down on paper. He is an avid runner, and when not racing, he
tree-plants, writes poetry, and walks long distances.

Ray Dangel (“Sanity at the Keyboards“) is Associate Editor of Planet Magazine. He is a retired newspaper editor who lives near Denver, Colorado. He has been reading and writing science fiction for many years.

Romeo Esparrago (volunteer art guy wannabe) says: Did you know that Johnny Rico in the movie “Starship Troopers” should’ve been played by Romeo? Robert Heinlein wrote that Rico is Filipino, just like Romeo! Anyways, visit Romeo’s RomeDome.Com Web site at <http://www.romedome.com>.

Dennis Fisher (“A Curiosity“) is a Maine native who moved back there after living many years in a cramped nearby state, bought a small old farm near Bangor, and has taken up organic growing. He went to college at Colby in Waterville. The climate can be trying, but it isn’t nearly as bad as in Aroostook County, where I was born. There, the snow drifts up over the houses and people tunnel from place to place under the snow, like voles. Dennis has written a book on navigation called “Latitude Hooks and Azimuth Rings” for TAB/McGraw-Hill, published in 1994, and three books on homebrewing for Storey Publishing. The latest, “The Homebrewer’s Garden”, on growing your own brewing ingredients, should appear in fall 1998. Dennis collaborates a lot with his brother and writing partner, Joe Fisher. He’s also sold two science fiction stories to Aboriginal Science Fiction: “Locals” and “Feeders”. These concern the adventures of a hardbitten fisherman named Tom on a rocky, watery planet full of incredibly violent natives called Locals.

Sharone Katz (“Dewey Meets the Alien“) is part human, part animated character. She’s been known to answer to the name “Bonehead.” Will write for food.

Jean King (“Rocketeering“) is a poet.

Bidermeier van Leeuwonhoek (zilch) once again appears only in the About the Authors page. He once groped himself yet remains at large, and unprosecuted. Beware the idiots of March, quoth he. <neo-Luddite>

Jonathan Lowe (“Dittohead“) was born in Minneapolis and now resides in Tucson. He has won writing awards from South Carolina Arts Commission, Greenville Arts Festival, and Writer’s Digest Magazine. In 1987 he scripted a short film for the Greenville Symphony, titled “Ghostly Mozart,” which was shown to students in the local school system and at the Symphony’s Mozart Festival. In addition, readings of two short plays were given at the Warehouse Theater in Greenville, and one long play “Caribbean Blue” at the Old Pueblo Playwrights in Tucson. His play “Doctor Whom” was published by the Contemporary Service, and his short play “Almost Persuaded” was produced at BLU. His first novel, a suspense fiction set in Tucson and titled Postmarked For Death, was published in the spring of 1996 in hardcover. Magazine credits include Omni, Los Angeles, International Living, Adventure Travel, Cruising World, Rider, Real People, Arizona Highways, The George Mason University Review, and the Tucson Guide Quarterly. Electronic Books reviewed recently in Phoenix Magazine and Mystery Scene. URL: <http://www.mirror.org/commerce/hmspress/lowe.html>

Andrew G. McCann (“If This Is Tuesday…“) is editor and naif artiste of Planet Magazine, which is notorious throughout the Five Quadrants as “The Tall Nordics’ Ill-Conceived Gift to Mankind.” He wrote and drew anything in the zine that’s otherwise unattributed. His home page: <http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/5801/>. Planet Magazine’s home page: <http://www.etext.org/Zines/planet/>

Irette Patterson (“Roach No More“) has a degree in biology from Florida A&M University. She lives in Atlanta, Georgia.

Frederick Rustam (“Fergus The Templar“) is a writer who’s been published by a number of zines, including Planet Magazine.

Ernest Slyman (“Alien Indulgence“) was born in Appalachia (Elizabethton, Tennessee) and attended East Tennessee State University. He has been widely published, in The Laurel Review, The Lyric, Light: A Quarterly of Light Verse (Chicago), The New York Times, Reader’s Digest, and The Bedford Introduction to Literature (St. Martins Press, edited by Michael Meyer), as well as Poetry: An Introduction (St. Martins Press, edited by Michael Meyer).
Home page:<http://www.geocities.com/soho/7514>

A.Y. Tanaka (“The Nature of the Correspondence“) was born on Maui in 1936, raised in Newark, N.J. (safer than the West Coast); lived, sometimes worked, in Puerto Rico, San Francisco, Hawaii, Chicago, Amherst, perhaps elsewhere. His proudest achievement was inventing a phantom senior for his high school yearbook (Weequahic HS, Newark). Since then it’s been downhill. Subsequent honors and attainments are as nought.

Theo (cover art) is an artist. <http://www.world-net.net/users/theo/Theo_Art_Gallery.htm>.

Eldon Tyrell (“Companions“) is a poet and head of the Tyrell Corp.
URL: <http://www.geocities.com/CapeCanaveral/Lab/3848/index.htm>

Craig Urquhart (“I’ll Miss Those Martian Sunsets“) is a freelance writer in Toronto, Canada. He does everything from restaurant, movie and book reviews (for pleasure) to technical and procedures manuals (for money). He also writes fiction and has lots of opinions. URL: <http://www.interlog.com/~gilgames>

Rowan Wolf (“The Climb“) is a writer.

“Also, a Watched Pot, Filled With Non-Boilable Material, Most Certainly Never Boils”

About this Magazine (Masthead)

Masthead

Planet Magazine: “The Handbook of Galactic Dictators Everywhere!”

Planet Magazine, Vol. 5, No. 1 (the 17th issue)

Home Page: http://www.etext.org/Zines/planet/

Editor & Publisher
Andrew G. McCann editor@planetmag.com

Cover Artist
Theo
Cover Title: “Gully Probe”

Art Director
Romeo Esparrago

Associate Editor
Ray Dangel

WHAT BE PLANET MAGAZINE?

Planet Magazine is a free, award-winning electronic quarterly of short science fiction, fantasy, horror, poetry, and humor written by beginning or little-known writers (mostly), whom we hope to encourage in their pursuit of the perfect tale. There could be other reasons we’re doing this, of course, motivations that are obscure and uncomfortable; instincts linked perhaps to primal, nonreasoning urges regarding power and procreation — the very same forces, no doubt, that sank the Atlanteans and their alabaster-towered oceanic empire. And the Dark Gods laffed.

Planet is internationally distributed in electronic form (text and full-color versions) via the World Wide Web (mainly Etext.Org), America Online, CompuServe, and Tin-Foil-Hat Receptrons. Total circulation is “lotz” per issue worldwide. Feel free to download this zine or make a single printout, as long as you don’t charge for it or alter it in any way. That would be not only illegal but also “unfair.” Submissions are welcomed (see below). Planet does not carry advertising or offer a subscription service, but issues are always available at our Web site. Letters to the editor are also welcome and are likely to be printed.

SUBMISSIONS POLICY & WRITER GUIDELINES

Planet Magazine accepts original (preferably unpublished) short science fiction, fantasy, and horror stories, poems, or one-act plays from anyone (use the lengths in this issue as a guideline). We will not publish anything we judge to be porno, gore, or in violation (as far as we are able to tell) of any copyrights (such as stories that use Star Trek characters). Since Planet is free and carries no ads, we can’t pay anything except the spirit-sustaining currency of free publicity and life-enhancing good vibes. We also accept original illustrations.

Send text submissions as plain, unformatted files (either as an e-mail attachment or, if short enough, in the body of an e-mail message) to editor@planetmag.com. Two submissions max at a time, please.

Send illustration submissions separately as e-mail attachments, and stuff or zip them first. They should be either 256-color, 16-color, 16-gray, or B&W GIFs or JPEGs. Please query first.

DISTRIBUTION SITES

Formats: Beginning with this issue, Planet Magazine is distributed in Web (HTML) format only, which can be read best with any version 3.0 Web browser or above, such as Netscape Navigator, Internet Explorer, or Opera (the prior issue is also in Web format.) All previous issues are downloadable in three electronic versions: text-only (for PC or Mac using any word-processing program), Acrobat PDF (full-color version for PC or Mac using the free Acrobat Reader), and DOCMaker (full-color, self-running file with sounds; Mac only).

Planet Magazine can be downloaded from the following sources, among others:

The main place to go is the World Wide Web, where you’ll find our home page at http://www.etext.org/Zines/planet/ and be able to download any version of any issue.

America Online’s Writer’s Club Forum (keyword: WRITERS; look for the Electronic Magazine Library), Science Fiction & Fantasy Forum (keyword: SCIENCE FICTION; look for the Member Fiction & Scripts Library), or the Macworld software library (keyword: MACWORLD; search the new uploads section).

CompuServe’s Science Fiction & Fantasy Forum (go: SFLIT; look in the Science Fiction literature library). This library carries only the older text version.

COPYRIGHTS, DISCLAIMERS

Planet Magazine as a whole, including all text, design, and illustrations, is copyright © 1998 by Andrew G. McCann. However, all individual stories and poems in this magazine are copyright © 1998 by their respective authors or artists, who have granted Planet Magazine the right to use these works for this issue in both electronic and printed forms. All people and events portrayed in this magazine are entirely fictitious and bear no resemblance to actual people or events. This publication, along with every past issue of Planet Magazine, is registered with the Copyright Office of the U.S. Library of Congress, as are the names “Planet Magazine”, “PlanetZine”, and “McCann’s Planet Magazine”. You may freely distribute this magazine electronically on a non-commercial, nonprofit basis to anyone and print one copy for your personal use, but you may not alter or excerpt Planet in any way without direct permission from the publisher, at editor@planetmag.com. Any unauthorized access, reproduction, or transmission of Planet Magazine is strictly prohibited by law. Planet Magazine is published by Cranberry Street Press, Brooklyn, N.Y., USA, Andrew G. McCann, publisher.

COLOPHON

These Web pages were designed and created by Romeo A. Esparrago, Jr., on a PowerMac 6100/66 using TableWorks and SimpleText. The text is Arial/Geneva; the logotypes are Times New Roman. Illustrations were done in pencil and ink and highlighter markers, ColorIt! and Painter 4. Each issue carefully spanked by an e-physician. *